She’ll either find it silly or funny enough to back out of her plans to harvest me for one of my kidneys.
She chuckled when she saw it. Just a little. Not enough to let me know either way. Though looking back, she probably thought I could have killed her too.
She led me into her living room and had me sit on the couch. On the coffee table was a footlong sub from Subway.
It was already unwrapped. It wasn’t cut in the middle like they normally do. It was the full twelve inches. Or maybe it was less, I’ve never measured.
She smiled as she sat down next to me.
I scanned the room.
Her place was a little nicer than mine. She obviously didn’t have any kids. She didn’t actually tell me but there was a bong on one of the end tables. If my kids were over there, I know the three year old would have been playing with it by now.
“Are you hungry?” Kimberly asked.
“A little,” I responded. I wasn’t really hungry. I was too nervous. I also didn’t want to eat anything that may have led me to farting in front of her.
“I got us a sub,” she informed me, seeming oblivious to the fact that I had eyes and was sitting two feet away from the sub.
“You did?” I asked, pretending I didn’t see the sub that was sitting two feet away from me. “That was nice of you.”
“Thank you,” she said as she leaned forward to grab the sub.
“Do you want to cut it up?” I asked.
“Listen,” she stopped, turning towards me. “I need to be honest up front. I have certain needs. Certain desires.”
I shook my head. Doesn’t everyone? I thought to myself.