The Hand Job

by Rip Peterson

Table of Contents

Even though Shawn was more friendly, he never did anything like let me use a device for internet access. It wouldn’t have done any good anyway. I’d forgotten my Facebook password years ago. I don’t know any phone numbers so that was out too.

Plus by this point, that was my old life. Everyone had probably moved on. They probably thought I left town or got murdered and my body is at the bottom of a lake.

They’ll be so surprised if they ever see me again. I wonder if they ever reported me missing. It would be cool if I ended up on Unsolved Mysteries. That would be a trip. I wonder if they still make that show.

The point being, he was gone a lot. The former president. He had an election to win. I hoped that he didn’t win. Nothing to do with politics but the club was a little bit nicer than the White House. My room there was a closet compared to my room now. Plus I have come to appreciate the sunshine.

During the campaign season while the former president was gone, Shawn frantically came into my room.

“Pack up some clothes,” he ordered. “We have to go now!”

He threw a black trash bag at me.

I grabbed it and threw in what few clothing items I had.

“Should I grab my tooth-“

“We’ll get one after we get to Pennsylvania,” he said, grabbing the trash bag filled with all my belongings.

Well, apparently someone tried to kill the former president. I was rushed to Pennsylvania to save him.

When we got there, it was obvious that he didn’t need saving. There was a bit of his ear missing though.

“It looks stupid,” the former president said. “It’s gonna leave a scar.”

He had everyone leave the room so we could have a session.